Facing Reality

This evening, Jon and I (along with Emelia and Asa!) met with Dr Roberts in our home. Dr Roberts’ name has come up several times since Asa has been born, so it was nice to finally meet her. She is the children’s hearing specialist. She went through the summary from Asa’s hearing test a few days ago and explained things to us again about the high pitch sounds. Asa will have more hearing tests in the future and these will build up a more comprehensive picture of where Asa’s hearing actually lies. *Gulp!*

The options we have for helping Asa’s hearing:

1. No intervention yet; watch for signs Asa can/can’t hear, monitor the hearing loss;

2. Hearing aids, which would involve fortnightly visits to UHW for the first year or so to check the fit, get new moulds as necessary and check they are working effectively. This option is only possible if Asa’s ear canals are big enough!

3. Softband bone conductor hearing aid. This is a bit like a hair band with a single hearing aid attached which sit behind the ear / on the skull to conduct sounds through the bone to the cochlear. It is easier to use for little ones.

Dr Roberts said that she’d leave us to make a decision and would likely contact us in a week or so to have another discussion about the way forward. I love that there is no pressure and the doctors and audiologists are willing to listen to the parents. Part of me does not want any intervention – just let Asa be a little baby, let us just enjoy him, no more medical appointments; I want it to go away. Another part of me wants what is best for him and the desire for him to be able to fully hear everything. And yet another part of me is concerned for his speech development and wants immediate action to help him!!!! We’ve been told that Asa’s hearing may get worse over the winter months due to coughs, colds and general congestion, and that this worsening may be temporary or may gradually get worse. *Another gulp!*

I am still finding the fact that Asa has a hearing loss in both ears quite difficult to come to terms with. I know that it’s not the end of the world. I keep remembering my wise friend Emily saying that, “yes, there’s a problem, but at least there is a solution to this particular problem,” and she’s so right. This problem can be helped. Plus God is in control of it all anyway.

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Our little Superman Poser!

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Tonight I’ve had a fab time reading my Bible. I haven’t picked it up as much as I’d like lately, but I’m blessed when I do! God’s word, the Bible, is living and is relatable even after thousands of years! Tonight I have been reading Nehemiah:

“…Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength”… (8v10)

“Stand up and praise the Lord your God, who is from everlasting to everlasting. Blessed be your glorious name, and may it be exalted above all blessing and praise. You alone are the Lord. You made the heavens, even the highest heavens, and all their starry host, the earth and all that is on it, the seas and all that is in them. You give life to everything, and the multitudes of heaven worship you.” (9v5-6)

Every now and then I re-discover (or discover for the first time) a gem hidden in God’s word. This is one of my favourite passages. Chapter 8v10 is a rebuke. Those who were listening to Ezra and the Levites reading and teaching the Law realised the severity of their sins and were deeply grieved by them; but Nehemiah is saying to the people not to grieve their past sins, God has forgiven them – instead focus on God and He will strengthen us and be our joy. How apt for me. I find it hard to let go of the sin in my life and it upsets me that I continually fail God and those I love. But the joy of the Lord is my strength! He graciously upholds me when I mess up, which I do, with alarming frequency.

I love chapter 9, especially verses 5-6. It’s a reminder that God made (and makes) everything, He alone gives life. God didn’t make a mistake when He created our little Asa, nor did He with Emelia or any baby born. Nehemiah 9 is about the people of Israel, God’s special people, letting God down again and again. Yet God forgives time and again! I’m reminded of myself here, with alternating between faith and fear; sadness and joy; hope and despair. God understands and is faithful to forgive me, just like He did with the Israelites. This chapter demonstrates the compassion, grace, forgiveness, love and mercy of God…

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Oh God, how awesome You are that you love us so much! I praise You for being willing to forgive me even when I least deserve it. Not just once, but time, after time, after time!!!! I’m thankful for your grace and mercy, for You loving me, a broken and weak woman!

 

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